10. Can’t count on aging to get a good night's sleep
9. As if doctors didn't have god complexes already
8. Plausible alibis for dirty old men
7. Makes a penis look super angry
6. There goes your free time
5. Pants tents everywhere in the nursing home
4. Doesn't prevent guys buying embarrassing muscle cars
3. Humiliating ER visits where staff asks: "But did you try a blow job?"
2. Those simpering, chiffon-clad fake nymphos in the commercials
1. Now any time...is the right time??
**This is not about my husband