Maripat Robison

Maripat Robison
HEAVILY RETOUCHED PHOTO

Sep 26, 2013

Can't Pass This




Ten Ways To Know You Are Following Your Spouse's Car


  The car shoots out into traffic, leaving you no clear opening for the next 10 cars.

  The car runs a yellow light and you are stuck with the red.

  You decide the number of cars between you is the number of weeks before you have sex again.

  You start to count how many times the car drifts across the center line, and also the shoulder.

  You find yourself estimating how closely the car is tailgating the person in front of them. 

  You mentally shout, "Stop tailgating!" 

  The car changes lanes and there's no room for you to do the same.

  You are embarrassed that the car stays in the passing lane, even though it's causing a backup.

  You shout out loud, "Get over, some one's trying to pass," but nothing happens.

  As soon as you can, you step on the gas and pass the car to demonstrate how to drive correctly.

10 comments :

  1. Is this showing how your hsuband drives? Maybe it is less stressing to be in the car behind that in the car itself...

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  2. I hope my wife never sees this!

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  3. LOL! Excellent observational skills! I was particularly impressed with your telepathic ability. I think he, "heard" you. ;)

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  4. I wonder how intentional every action he took was (being so intelligent and having a sense of humor), because he was being followed!

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  5. I am unable to catch any winks when we drive to FL because my husband, the geek, is constantly changing lanes, and not in a smooth way! I DO have a handle to grab above the window, which I use often........

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  6. Didn't you mean " your spelling"?

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  7. Funny stuff - I can identify! " You start to count how many times the car drifts across the center line, and also the shoulder." This scares me to death, IN the car with him OR following. He just says "it's his lane and he likes to use ALL of it!"

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  8. Oh, so that;s how you lady's decide how often we get lucky.

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  9. I content that this is not as bad as being married to a husband that drives like a myopic grandmother. I can almost feel the frustration of drivers behind us as he takes half a mile to change lanes while driving under the speed limit. And then forgets to turn off the turn signal. He says his annoying driving is because he is Canadian, so it's a cultural thing (thereby rendering it acceptable).

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