How Many Doctors?

Dr. Swill

Dr. Schnoz

Dr. Laura Ignoramus

How Many Doctors?

Dr. Ignoramus:  Don't tell me! I wrote MY thesis on the effects of Insulin on Laboratory Rats. I'm a special, Specialist.

Dr. Swill: Don't know. I don't actually have a license to practice, I just exploit people's emotions on TV. And it's good money. Great, actually.

Dr. Schnoz: Hold up! I am a real medical doctor. I specialize in dieting, voodoo and yoga/kombucha. I am an actual MD. 

Dr. Ignoramus: Anyway, what's the point? We have Common Sense. And Common Sense says: People are going to die anyway, it's time to get the money rolling again.

Dr. Swill: You know, I just got an infinity-sized pool installed.

Dr Schnoz: Be careful with that. Lots of people, lots, lots, of people die by swimming pools. 

Dr. Ignoramus: And you heard it here, first!